


Vinegar and Baking Soda

by LadyAhiru



Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
Genre: Bi!Pan! Jaskier, Eskel has a Dog, Eskel has a farm with therapy horses, Falling In Love, Flirting, Gay! Eskel, Getting to Know Each Other, Jaskier & Yennefer BFFs, Jaskier is a burnt out singer, M/M, Modern AU, Past Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Past Drug Use, Power Bottom! Jaskier, Ride a Witcher, Save a Horse, Slow Burn, Top! Eskel, and a huge dick, and chickens, and goats, and horses, more tags will follow
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-21
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:28:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24840799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyAhiru/pseuds/LadyAhiru
Summary: Jaskier is not just burnt out if he continues with his toxic lifestyle like this he wont make it to thirty. Finally willing to change things and better himself he seeks help and takes a long overdue time out on Eskels farm.
Relationships: Eskel/Jaskier | Dandelion, Jaskier | Dandelion & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Comments: 189
Kudos: 137
Collections: The Modern Witcher AU Collection





	1. I am fucked

**Author's Note:**

> In which Jaskier hits the brakes

* * *

How many times could you wake up in your own vomit before you realized that you had to make some changes in life or probably die very young? Julian, or Jaskier as his stage name went, was not even thirty yet, and yet he was completely burned out. Too much alcohol, drugs, the wrong “friends” and not enough sleep would do that to a person.

Sitting up on his sticky kitchen floor it hit him like a train on full speed. He needed a break and more importantly, he needed to make some changes or he would not make it to his thirstiest birthday next year.

Jaskiers manager and friend Yennefer had begged him for years to change his lifestyle but so far he didn’t listen. Now, as he wobbled to his bathroom and put his dirty trousers into the washer he realized she was right.

After a hot shower, he felt slightly better and started to clean the mess in his kitchen. Did he really drink two whole bottles of vodka last night? Shit, he really had a problem. He let himself fall down onto his stained sofa and looked around his apartment. It was full of overpriced stuff he didn’t really need but there was not one picture or happy memory of times with friends, mostly because Yennefer was his only true friend and the rest only hung out with him for his fame and money.

His manager picked up after the third ring and before she could say something he started to cry.

“Jask? What’s wrong? Are you hurt? What do you need?”

He had known Yennefer for almost 15 years, they had gone to an exclusive private school together and she had always believed in him and supported him. Most people thought her cold and bitchy but Jaskier knew better.

“I am fucked Yenna. I am a mess. I need….” He took a deep breath. “I need to stop drinking. The drugs…I need to get my shit together.”

There was silence for a moment on the other end of the line before he could hear her smile.

“I am so proud Jask. I know it’s hard to ask for help. It’s okay.”

Her warm words washed over him and he curled into a small ball onto the sofa.

“Here’s what you should do. Take a shower if you haven’t already and drink some water. Then pack some stuff. I’ll send you a car in 3 hours. I just need to organize some things.”

He blinked in confusion. “Where am I going?”

“I have a friend whose brother owns a farm. He sometimes takes in people who…are in need of a bit of help. I know getting down and dirty with animals is not your dream but trust me it will be good for you.”

Jaskiers first instinct was to refuse, to say no thanks. He was a city boy, always had been and the idea to get up at ass o clock in the morning to tend to a bunch of dirty animals made him almost sick. Then he looked up and took his awful surroundings in and a heavy sight left his lungs.

“Okay Yenna, I trust you.”

“Good! Now get up and get moving.”

She hung up before he could respond and Jaskier, after pushing a hand through his still wet hair, made his way upstairs to get his suitcase.

It took him almost the whole three hours before the car arrived to decide what to take. Most of his clothing was fashionable and expensive and not made to get down and dirty with farm animals.

Finally, he decided on what to pack and dressed in his oldest pair of skinny black jeans, that had still cost a few hundred dollars, some old leather boots he didn’t mind getting dirty and a loose Shirt with his band logo on it.

Yennefer’s driver, Hugo? Hubert? Hector? Damn, he knew his name started with an H but he could not for the life of him remember it, even though he had been driven by him countless times.

The chauffeur handed him a steaming cup of coffee and a tiny brioche brezel and Jaskier smiled openly at him before taking his seat. Thankfully that the driver did not force him into small talk Jaskier ate his breakfast and closed his eyes for a quick nap.


	2. Ya done starin city boy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier meets his new host

“Sir? We are here…” The driver’s warm voice slowly made his way to Jaskiers mind and he stretched like a lazy cat, woken from slumber. A quick look at his watch told him that they had driven for almost six hours, the evening sun slowly starting to set outside. He got out of the car, stretched again and grabbed his suitcase, watching as the car turned around and left.

Shaking, not just from nerves but also alcohol withdrawal he made his way to the large wooden building in front. There was a huge hand-painted sign that read “Scorpions Haven” that looked old and weathered. The rest of the building seemed to be in a pretty good condition and dozens of blooming flowers were perched on the window sills.

“Hey….”

Jaskier took a sharp breath in and turned around only to be met with a giant of a man. He must have been at least 6´5 if not larger and he was wide and broad and looked strong enough to pick him up and throw. The singer blinked and stared as he took the other man in. He was dressed in faded blue jeans and a dark red flannel, his hair combed back and his amber eyes looked almost golden in the evening sun. Fuck, he was breathtakingly beautiful, thick muscles, scars and all.

“Ya done starin city boy?”

Cursing himself Jaskier coughed and nodded. “Sorry I….”

“I get it. Ya are not the first who’s repulsed by the scars. No worries, Darlin.”

“What!? No! I wasn’t! Shit! No!”

The man chuckled and the warm and deep sound went straight to Jaskiers cock. It had been a while since he had gotten laid and now he cursed himself for being weak for strong big men.

“So you are Julian I assume? Or is it Jaskier?”

The young musician opened his mouth. “I….yes…both…neither?” He hated his birth name, it only brought back unhappy memories but currently, he wasn’t that happy with Jaskier either. He wanted a new start, a new identity, to better himself and he felt suddenly very lost.

The tall man tilted his head and looked at the buttercup logo on his shirt before he smiled. “How about that, I’ll call you buttercup until you decide what name you prefer. That all right?”

Jesus, Jaskier could feel his knees grow weak so he nodded. “And you are?”

“Ah, Eskel, at your Service.” He grabbed Jaskiers hand but instead of shaking it, he pressed a soft kiss to his knuckles. The way his voice drawled made Jaskiers heart beat faster. 

“Well come on then buttercup, I’ll show you your room.” Smiling he walked passed Jaskier, giving him a perfect view of his butt covered in the thick jeans. Jaskier sighed. He was so very fucked.


	3. It’s okay to not be okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier settles in

The inside of the house was warm and comfortable and Jaskier could feel himself relax a bit. Eskel showed him to a small bedroom with an enclosed bathroom and smiled. “Dinner will be ready in about an hour Buttercup. Take your time unpacking.”

He turned around and left and Jaskier looked around in the small room. There was not much furniture in it. A small wooden bed frame with a soft-looking comforter on it. A wardrobe and a leather armchair in one of the corners. Still, it was warmer and cosier than his own home and he slowly started to hang his things up before washing his face and hands.

He still felt uneasy and hungry as the delicious smell of roasted chicken made its way upstairs. When he came down he was first greeted by a large but slender dog who looked happy to see him. “Oh hello there! Aren’t you a handsome boy….or girl?”

He crouched down to rub the dog’s ears as Eskel laughed behind him. “His name is Dante, he’s a McNab Shepard. Technically his job is to herd the goats but he sometimes he thinks he’s a lapdog.” He turned around to reply to Eskel but was taken back by the look of his host. He had exchanged the jeans and flannel for dark grey sweats and a, way too tight, shirt that clung to him like a second skin and Jaskier wondered for a second if Yennefer had sent him to a strip club instead of a farm.

“Come on, foods ready.” The singer let himself be lead into the warm and open kitchen and was soon sitting at a beautiful wooden table, chicken in front of him. He was craving some wine but he wasn’t offered any and he knew he should not drink anyway.

“So. Uhm…you friends with Yennefer?”

“My brother Geralt is. I think they dated in high school?”

“Mhm.” Jaskier shoved another piece of food into his mouth. He could not remember when he had last tasted something so deliciously. “Chicken is really good Eskel. Uhm, thank you, for the food and for uhm taking me in. I….What has Yenna told you?”

“Only that you are dear to her and that you need some help getting back onto your feet? That you made some bad choices in the past.”

Jaskier nodded and took a sip of the homemade ice tea. “And you just agreed to let me stay for….well a few weeks I assume?”

Eskel shrugged and smiled. “You can stay as long as need be. Weeks, months I don’t mind, it’s nice to have company and I can always use the help with the animals.”

“I have no idea how to…”

Laughing loudly Eskel looked him over. “Oh, I know city boy. I am sure you haven’t seen a live chicken in years, if ever but it's okay, Darlin. I’ll tell you what to do.” Jaskiers traitorous mind promptly provided him with possible other scenarios in which Eskel would take the lead and tell him what to do and he had to empty his glass of ice tea to keep from blushing hard.

“Good that’s good….so do we get up at ass o clock tomorrow?”

Eskel snorted and his grin tugged on his scar and Jaskier just wanted to lean in and lick it. Jesus, he needed a cold shower after five minutes with the man, how was he supposed to survive weeks or even months?

“No, I am….since tomorrow is Saturday I'll let you sleep in.”

“What really?”

“Yes. I appreciate the free labour but you are here to get better, find yourself, so I am giving you the weekend off. You can go anywhere on the farm and I assume you have at least some base logic of not to tease animals?” Jaskier nodded and waited for his host to continue. “Good, so sleep, eat, rest, read, and explore, whatever. On Monday I will wake ya at 5 though.”

“Okay, I…yeah….thank you…I.” Jaskiers hands started to slightly shake. He felt overwhelmed and tired and like he was about to cry any minute when Eskel brought a warm hand to his shoulder and squeezed. “Hey, it’s okay to not be okay.”

Taking a deep breath in Jaskier tried to smile and went back to his food.

“You can use anything in the house or eat anything in the fridge. I would prefer to have at least dinner together so we could get to know each other but I won’t make ya do that if you want to be alone. There are some Tupper boxes in the fridge with a dog sticker on them, don’t eat that. Its Dante’s food.”

“You keep your dog food in Tupper boxes?”

“Well, I barf him, meaning I cook for him every few days. It’s healthier for him. Most processed canned food is full of wheat and sugar.”

“Oh, I did not know that.” The singer leaned down to pet the dog who rested under his chair.

“So no treats?”

Eskel laughed. “You can give him a few treats each day, just not too many. And not when he’s working. I keep them in the cookie jar over there.” He gestured to a cupboard. “Mrs Johnson who owns the next farm over makes them.” Jaskier was just about to take another sip when Eskel continued.

“I think she tries to bribe me to go out with her granddaughter and so far I haven’t had the heart to tell her I’m as gay as they come.” Jaskier took a breath in while drinking, promptly getting the liquid in the wrong pipe and being pushed into a coughing fit. For a second he thought the irony of choking on ice tea after almost drinking himself to death was hilarious before he was pulled up and Eskel gently hit at his back until he could breathe again.

“Ya okay there, buttercup?” There was real worry in the farmer’s voice and Jaskier softly nodded. “Yeah, sorry.”

Eskel pulled up an eyebrow in question. “It’s not gonna be a problem between us is it?” Jaskier looked confused for a second before he realized the other referred to him being gay.

“Oh god, no. I mean that would be super hypocritical of me. I mean I’m bi, well or pan…haven’t really decided on a label yet. Uhm, What I mean is I’m an equal opportunist.”

Eskel smiled and refilled his glass. “Good to know…buttercup.” His voice dropped a few octaves at the last word and suddenly Jaskier was shaking again, this time not from withdrawal. He wasn’t sure if he should thank Yennefer or curse her. This was going to be a long fucking summer.


	4. It’s okay to not be okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier cant sleep

Jaskier could not sleep. He tossed and turned and just found that the bed is too soft, too clean and too comfortable. It also didn’t help that every time he closed his eyes he would see Eskels smile before him, his lips curled upward and so very kissable. The craving to drink or smoke something was overwhelming and around 5 am he gave up and got out of bed again.

He put on sweatpants and the shirt he wore the day before when he sneaked down to the kitchen, surprised to see Eskel up and brewing coffee.

“Can’t sleep Buttercup?”

There was no judgement in the farmer’s voice but real worry and Jaskiers suddenly felt awful for wanting to drink the man’s alcohol stash in secret. He started to violently shake, like a leaf in the wind and an awful sob left his mouth. Eskel was at his side in an instant close enough to touch but not yet touching.

“Hey buttercup, it’s okay. I would like to hug you if that’s okay?” Jaskier whined once more and buried his head against Eskels chest. He was aware that he was crying and getting snot all over his host but for a moment he didn’t even care about that. He felt surprisingly save in Eskels strong arms that wrapped around him as soon as he had hugged the older man.

There was a gentle hand moving to the crown of Jaskiers head, softly brushing through his hair and he suddenly realized how warm Eskel felt around him and how deliciously he smelled yet he was not ready to take a step back yet.

Eskel did not move either, just stroking his hair and back in gently even movements his cheek pressed against Jaskiers head.

“You doing okay Buttercup, it takes time. Progress is not linear. You are not in this alone. I got you.”

Jaskier wondered who this man was that he had only met the day before and yet his words made him feel so warm and hopeful and like it was okay to fall apart. He was sobbing like a small child snot running all over his face but he found that for the first time in his adult life he didn’t care about appearances, all he cared about was that he felt like a heavy weight lifted from his shoulders and that he was save in Eskels arms.

They stood like that in the kitchen for almost twenty minutes, Eskels old Coffee Maker gurgling in the background and Dante waiting and the front door to be let out. Finally, Jaskier moved away and gave Eskel a weak smile.

“Go on Buttercup, wash your face and I’ll get you some coffee.”

Nodding Jaskier went into the small downstairs bathroom not daring to look at himself in the mirror. He was still shaking but the need to get a drink was slightly less aggressive and he took a deep breath before walking back into the spacious kitchen.

“Hey….How do you take your coffee?”

Jaskier shrugged. Usually, he would get something at a coffee shop with whipped cream and caramel and nuts. It had been years since he had his last ordinary cup of coffee.

“Uhm… a bit of milk and sugar?”

Smiling Eskel prepared him a cup and pushed it carefully into his hands.

“You want some breakfast too or too nauseous to eat?”

Jaskier stomach revolted at the thought of food and he shook his head.

“I…no….I….thank you.”

“Anytime Buttercup.”

Eskel also wasn’t keen on having breakfast so he made sure Dante was fed before opening the front door.

“You coming out or crawling back to bed?”

Jaskier was tired and drained yet the thought of being alone with his thoughts scared him more than anything. “I…I can watch?”

“Sure thing Buttercup. Come on, I'll introduce you to the ladies.”

Smiling Eskel took his bag and showed Jaskier where he kept the chickens.


	5. Goat you out of your shell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier makes a new friend

When Jaskier had been seven years old his nanny at the time had taken him to a petting zoo. He immediately fell in love with the tiny goats they had but when he tried to pet a chicken he got bitten so hard he had needed stitches so now he was eyeing Eskels birds very carefully. So far they seemed tame but he knew better than to trust their seemingly fluffy demeanour. He watched carefully how Eskel fed them and collected the eggs in a basket, sure that it would be one of his upcoming chores.

Eskel did not talk or explain anything so he kept close watch which was difficult because the singer found his gaze wandering to the handsome farmer instead of the birds every few minutes.

Finally, they moved onto a small barn where the Goats and Horses lived and Jaskier smiled at the sight of the goats. He watched as Eskel checked their hooves and fed them and leaned down to carefully let the smallest one sniff his hand.

“Huh, …she likes you….” Eskel said just as the goat gave Jaskiers hand a tiny lick and bleated happily.

“You sound surprised?”

“I am. Lil´ Bleater is a full-grown pigmy goat. She is the leader of the pack even though she’s the smallest. Usually, she is very wary of new people, border lining on being mean.”

“Huh….” Jaskier carefully scratched the little goat between her ears trying very hard not to focus on Eskels bright smile. “She usually follows me around the farm, but I was not sure if you two would get along….” The taller man gave Jaskier a very slow all over that had the musician blush deeply and nodded. “I know I said you get the weekend off but since you are awake anyway….you up for something fun?”

Jesus, Jaskier had to bit his tongue to not make a crude joke about how he was definitely up for fun with Eskel and nodded. “Good, take her out the pen and follow me.” Carefully Jaskier leaned over the small fence and lifted the tiny goat up. She went with him happily, holding still as if to not frighten him and curled up in his arms. Jaskier could feel himself being overwhelmed by the tiny animal and his eyes tearing up so he straightened his back and took a deep breath before setting Lil´ Bleater back onto the ground, outside her pen.

“She so soft….”

Eskel laughed and the sound tug on Jaskiers heartstrings. “She sure is…your job today will be to make sure she doesn’t get into any trouble, especially with Dante. She sometimes believes she’s the herding dog.”

Jaskier nodded laughing and promised himself to protect the little goat with all he got, already enamoured by the tiny animal. They moved on and spend the rest of the morning with the horses, brushing, cleaning and feeding. Usually, he would have asked questions but Jaskier did not have the energy in him today.

“So, I have to take a Horse out and check on the sheep, on nice days like this I let them on their meadow overnight. I should be back around noon, I will show you how to ride but you look pretty tired and I don’t want you to get hurt so why don’t you go back to the house, eat something and nap a bit, hm?”

Relieved that he didn’t have to lean riding today Jaskier nodded. “I…thank you Eskel.” The older man just shrugged and patted Jaskier on the shoulder before leading the singer back to the main house. “Well, see you later Buttercup.”

Jaskier watched until he could not see Eskel anymore and entered the house with a heavy sigh and a small goat.

Back at the House Jaskier made sure that Dante and Lil´ Beater had both access to fresh clean water if they needed it and washed his hands and face. He was tired but he knew f he napped now he would just be awake all night again. It was better to push through and go to bed early this evening instead of resting now. Since he actually felt a bit hungry and he wanted to do something nice for his host Jaskier decided to prepare lunch for them.

He hadn’t cooked in years, living on take out and expensive restaurant food most of the time but he was smart enough to follow a recipe. First, he checked what ingredients were available to him before deciding on a dish. He made sure to measure everything and laid it out in order he would use it so there could be no mistakes. He hadn’t made pasta sauce like that ever. The recipe said it needed to slow boil for hours but it already smelled better than any bought sauce he ever had, he just hoped that Eskel would like it too.


	6. the way to a mans heart is trough his stomach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier cooks

When Eskel made his way back to the main house he was met with the delicious smell of home-cooked ragout sauce and his mouth immediately started to water. The last time he had come home to find food already been ready was when he had still lived with his adopted father. Vesemir had not been the greatest cook but he had always tried to make the best of their spare resources and the food might not have been anything special but it had always been made with love and care.

He peaked his head in the kitchen and was met with the beautiful sight of Jaskier, not noticing him, deep in thought and concentration. He was rolling out yellowish dough on the kitchen counter and used one of the empty water glass bottles instead of a rolling pin to flatten the dough out. His tongue peeked out of the corner of his mouth, faint traces of flour-dusted on his hair and cheeks and the farmer suddenly wanted to keep him.

There was something utterly domestic about the skinny singer in his kitchen, barefoot, his shirt covered in flour and eggs while he prepared a meal for his host. When Geralt had called him and told him about the situation he had been hesitant to take the young man on. The last time he had helped someone like this had been years ago but Eskel was no therapist so he had been unsure if he should agree to his brother’s plea. He did agree to hear Yennefer out and after talking to her for almost an hour he had found himself agreeing to try to help Jaskier.

Besides the trouble, the musician had gotten himself in with his unhealthy addictions he knew almost nothing about him. A quick google search had filled in some blanks and he decided after finding Jaskier music on Spotify that he greatly enjoyed the music the other was making. What did make him want to help though was that he was brutally reminded of his own addiction that he had beaten almost 12 years ago. He was proud of being sober now but he also knew that he wouldn’t have been able to make it without the help of his brothers and their spouses.

Geralts wife Triss was a nurse and she was the first to directly talk to him about his issues, not judging just wanting to help but it had taken Lambert's boyfriend, now husband, Aiden to give him a firm talking to that he realized he needed help. He left his successful law firm in the hands of his surprised business partner, who eagerly bought him out, left the big city behind and after successfully attending rehab he had bought the farm to keep himself busy.

It had been meant as a short interlude but he had fallen in love with the animals and his work and now a decade later he was happy and fulfilled if even sometimes lonely. His brothers and father came visiting as often as their time would allow but it was not the same as having a partner of his own.

Jaskiers quiet humming brought him back to reality and he watched as the man started to cut the dough into long stringy shapes.

“Are you….making Pasta from scratch Buttercup`?”

The singer raised his head, looking up with a bright but tired smile on his face. It was clear that preparing this meal must have taken hours and the singer had probably not slept as Eskel had suggested. “Yes, well at least I am trying….I…is that ok?”

Worry made its way onto Jaskiers face and Eskel felt suddenly sad, wondering what life the young man must have had if he wasn’t even certain he was allowed to cook.

“Of course Buttercup. It smells delicious.”

The smile came back onto the singer's face and Eskel decided that he really liked the look of it.

“Great! The recipe had called for red wine in the sauce but you didn’t have any but I think it’s still good without it. You wanna try?”

Eskel nodded and moved around to stand besides Jaskier. “I don’t have any alcohol in the house. I am sober for 12 years.”

Jaskier blinked at him and stared, suddenly seeming shy and uncertain before standing up straight. “Thank you for….being open about that….I….is it hard to stop?”

“Yes, and it is hard every day afterwards. It helps to remove oneself from temptation.” Nodding the younger man sighed and raised a spoon full of sauce to Eskels mouth. “Here, try this!” Smiling Eskel let his mouth fall open and let himself be fed by Jaskier, not breaking eye contact during the exchange. To his utter delight, a faint blush spread on Jaskiers cheek.

“It’s delicious Buttercup. I did not know you could cook like that.”

Jaskier laughed full-heartedly. “Oh, me neither. I am just really good at following recipes and directions like that.” He salted the pasta water and set the timer a few minutes short than the recipe said because he wanted to finish cooking the noodles in the sauce.

“Well, go wash your hands, food will be ready soon.”

Nodding Eskel smiled and went into the small downstairs bathroom, smirking as he stepped over Lil´ Bleater who had curled in front of the door sleeping.


	7. testing the Waters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the boys flirt

When he came back Jaskier was in the midst of transferring a bit of pasta water to the sauce and swirling the noodles around. His tongue stuck out the corner of his mouth in concentration and for a second Eskel wondered what would happen if he just went over and kissed the other man.

Jaskier moving in his kitchen made him look like he just belonged there and Eskel could feel a warm tug in his belly. Ignoring the new feelings he cleared his throat and smiled as Jaskier set out two big portions for them and refilled his water glass.

“There you go Esk!”

The farmer blushed slightly at the nickname but did not respond beside nodding while smiling as he started to eat. The food was perfect and he happily hummed around his fork.

“This is delicious Jaskier!”

The younger man’s bright blue eyes widened with his smile as real happiness set upon his features and it made Eskels heart heavy that a simple compliment could make him so happy.

“Thank you.”

They ate slowly, talking in between bites about everything and nothing and when Eskel managed to make Jaskier laugh out loud the farmer knew he either needed to get rid of his growing attraction or act on it.

“So….anyone waiting for you at home? Anyone special?” Eskel leaned forward, over the table, slowly and almost by accident brushing his foot against Jaskiers leg, just to test the waters.

Jaskiers eyes widened and for a moment Eskel was afraid that he had might overstepped when the singer’s mouth transformed into a shy but beautiful smile and his cheeks tinted in a soft blush. “No…. I…no, nobody special…” The musician carefully rubbed his leg against Eskels touching foot, soft and testing. “The people I used to hang with, they weren’t good. I…I want to make better choices and meet better people.”

Smiling Eskel took Jaskiers hand in his, brushing his thumb over the singer's knuckles. “I am sure you will, Buttercup.”

Jaskier swallowed hard and was about to say something when Lil´ Bleater came over, bleating loudly and demanding attention. The moment was broken but he still felt like he was floating as he smiled at his host.

“Oh that reminds me, there is some old stuff in the unused barn, it would be a great help if you find some time to sort through it in the next days?”

“Sure.” Smiling Jaskier took their empty plates over to the sink and walked Eskel back to the door. Grinning he shuffled from one foot to the other. “Have a nice afternoon….dear.”

The smile on Eskels scarred face took over all of his features and Jaskier sighed happily as the other man pulled him into a small hug. “You too, Buttercup. See you at dinner.” A soft kiss was pressed to Jaskiers cheek but before he could react the older man had walked out of the house and went back to work.

Sighing Jaskier focused his attention back on the tiny goat at his feet. “Well, let’s feed you, hm?” The happy bleat that answered him made him laugh so hard he had to hold his stomach.


	8. Good and bad memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier reconnect with his past memories

Jaskier was not looking forward to cleaning out an old barn but he was quickly changing his tune. The barn was full of boxes and paintings and clothing and he felt like being at a vintage flea market discovering long lost treasures. He put an almost clean, if a bit dusty, blanket on the floor and sat down, opening the first box, full of old clothes. He decided to make three piles. One full of stuff that was to ruined or ripped and beyond repair to trash. One that was in good condition, could still be worn or sold after cleaning and one that might be able to repair and save. It took him almost an hour to get through the first box, taking his time to inspect each garment carefully and in detail, making sure he would not miss a rip or stain.

Lil´ Bleater patiently sat at his side, watching him and “helped” by chewing on the cardboard box. Laughing Jaskier put the ruined clothes in a bag and brought the other two piles back to the house. “Well…let’s see where the Washer is, yeah?” “Baaaah.” “Yes indeed….we need a snack.”

“Are you talking to my goat?” Jaskier turned around, hearing the clear amusement in Eskels voice who had come to the house to refill his water bottle.

“Maybe….” He grinned and grabbed an apple from the food bowl, slicing it in half and handing one piece to Lil´ Bleater. Eskel smiles warmly at the singer and the goat and when Jaskier looked up to him he could not stop himself from walking over and ruffle the other hair. He was rewarded by another soft expression on Jaskiers face, followed by a small hug.

“Do you want to check over the pile I would throw out?”

“No…Buttercup, I trust your judgment.”

“Oh…that’s…thank you….Do you have a sewing machine somewhere?”

Smiling Eskel nodded and showed Jaskier to a medium-sized craft room.

“Ohhh that’s amazing!”

“The former owner’s wife used it, I must confess I only come in here to clean but everything you see is yours.”

Slowly Jaskier turned around, there was a fiery glint in his eyes but a soft smile on his lips. “Everything I see?” He solely let his gaze wander over Eskels form who licked his suddenly dry lips. “Yes….everything.”

Jaskier coughed, his cheeks gaining colour. “That is very good to know…”

Eskel brushed his knuckles over a flake of dust on Jaskier neck and they both stared at each smilingly until Jaskier coughed once more and stretched. “See you later farm boy.”

Laughing Eskel nodded and went back to work, leaving Jaskier in the craft room.

When Jaskier had been small his parents had died during a car crash. He had only been five, old enough to miss them but young enough to move on as harsh as it sounded. His only living grandmother, recently widowed herself had taken him in and she had been a seamstress in her younger years. First, she showed little Julian how to make clothes for his toys and action figures, which quickly turned into making clothes for Jaskier himself. He remembered how proud she was, already sick and dying when he wore a self-made outfit to his very first gig. She had died a day after he had signed his major contract, holding on long enough to see her boy succeed, Jaskier only 19 at the time.

Now that he had a clearer head he remembered that he had slowly started drinking after her death, not that he blamed her just that it was one of those big events he never really gotten over. Sitting at Eskels sewing machine and looking around in the room, finding different fabrics and yarns and knitting needles and after craft stuff made him miss his Granny immensely but it was a bittersweet pain filled with good memories too and not just pain.

The machine came to live with a gentle drumming hum and after threading the needle, Jaskier went to work, a soft smile on his face.


	9. Wake me with a kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they kiss

Jaskier loved working with his hands. People always assumed he was a posh git, not able to craft something useful but growing up with his grandmother had thought him a lot of helpful skills. He was so lost in his work he did not even realize how much time had passed. He had finished stitching and mending and was now sitting on the small sofa of the craft room hand stitching some loose lace when he promptly fell asleep.

He was woken by a soft hand caressing his cheek. When he blinked his tired eyes open he was met by Eskels soft gaze and without even thinking he leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to the farmer’s lips. Eskel froze under him and suddenly Jaskier was wide awake. His eyes went wide and he moved back about to apologize furiously when Eskels hand grabbed his neck and pulled him back in, his scarred lips pressing hard against Jaskiers.

The singer sighed and opened his mouth, happy, his eyes closed. Eskels warm tongue slightly licked over his lips, not yet dipping in just testing and Jaskier grew impatient and deepened the kiss himself. There was a small pause from the farmer before he groaned directly into Jaskiers mouth and wrapped his arms around him. To his own embarrassment, Jaskier slightly whimpered when they had to stop for air and his cheeks slightly flushed with red.

“Uhm…hi….”

“Hi yourself Buttercup. Dinner is ready…..”

“Okay….”

They both looked at each other, none made any instance of moving and finally Eskel leaned back in and kissed Jaskier again and again until the singer's lips were flushed pink and slightly swollen, both breathing faster.

Jaskier was still tired yet he did not want the kissing to end, but he also did not want to move too hard too fast. He could not remember when he had ever felt about someone like that. The people he usually dated were more interested in the physical aspect of things and did not really care about him as a person but with Eskel everything was so much more.

Smiling Eskel pulled him to his feet.

“Come on, food waits.”

“Yes….food….”

The feeling of being kissed still lingered on Jaskiers lips but he suddenly felt exhausted, the bad sleep of last night finally catching up with him. Eskel smiled softly and fed him some light tomato soup before sending him off to bed.

“Just call it a night Buttercup. You are barely awake now.”

Nodding the young musician finished his soup and shuffled back up to his room. He was asleep the second his head hit the pillow and unlike the night before not haunted by bad dreams and cravings.

Meanwhile, Eskel made sure the dishes were clean before getting his night tea and sitting outside on the porch, both Lil´ Bleater and Dante at his side. Frustrated with himself he pushed a hand through his loose hair. He should not have kissed Jaskier like that, the young musician barely awake and just seeking comfort and he felt like he had taken advantage of the other one.

He knew he should apologize the next morning but all he really wanted to do was to crawl into bed with Jaskier and kiss him again.


	10. Cheese is the way to my heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jaskier falls even more in love

Eskel was about to head out for the day when he could hear Jaskiers footsteps coming down the stairs. Smiling he prepared a cup of coffee for his guest that the musician eagerly grabbed while he yawned.

“Good morning Buttercup.”

“Morning, Esk.”

Jaskier took a sip of his coffee, his fingers barely visible holding his mug as his long sweater arms reached beyond the middle of his hands. He smiled softly and so warmly at Eskel that the farmer had to fight the urge to just lean in and kiss him again. He knew he should say something but Jaskier looked so soft and right at home that he could not bring himself to open his mouth.

Meanwhile, Jaskier had no such issues and kissed Eskel right at the corner of his mouth in greeting.

“I’ll start on the books today if that’s cool. Where is my emotional support goat?”

Laughing Eskel gestured to Dante’s basket where the dog slept, a tiny goat sprawled all over him.

“You do that Buttercup. I'll grab you when Lunch is ready. Any orders?”

“I like cheese?”

“Is that a statement or a question, Buttercup?”

Smirking Jaskier shrugged and refilled his coffee. He pressed another soft peck to Eskels mouth before leaving, cup in hand and goat in tow to the barn, leaving the farmer behind to wonder and stare. Chuckling to himself he brought his focus back to his tasks at hand and whistles for Dante to follow him, already eager to see Jaskier again during lunchtime.

Jaskier felt giddy like he had last felt when he had been discovered by the big label he had first signed with. Positive nervousness flooding through his veins, and happiness spreading through his whole being.

He liked Eskel, really liked him but for once he did not want to jump into something physical right away. He wanted to do things right and slow and enjoy getting to know the other more and more. Sitting on his blanket and sipping on his coffee, Lil´ Bleater next to him, rubbing her head against his thigh he opened the first book to see what it was.

Most of Eskels collection was old, without any description on the cover and he had to read each one a bit to properly sort them. About two hours in he found a handwritten tome that turned out to be an old diary that he quickly became obsessed with. In it, a young woman described how she had run away from her rich family to marry a, in her parent's eyes, unworthy, farm owner. Jaskier quickly figured out that he had owned the farm that belonged to Eskel now as he kept reading.

He was so wrapped up in the story he hadn’t even noticed that lunch hour had arrived and only looked up when Eskel came to collect him.

“There you are Buttercup, food is ready.”

“Oh…already? I …ok.”

Smiling Eskel reached out and helped Jaskier back on his feet, whose big blue eyes sparkled happily at him.

“Found something interesting?”

“Oh yes! It’s a diary! I think it belonged to the wife of the previous owner? Or maybe even longer back!”

Widely gesturing Jaskier told Eskel what he had learned about so far while they made their way back to the main house. “Does she state her name? Or his?”

Smiling Eskel put the hot pot of cheese soup onto the table and handed Jaskier his plate and some fresh bread.

The singer’s eyes went wide for a moment. “You….you made me cheese soup?”

“You said you like cheese…..”

“Ah…that’s…thank you.”

A shy smile made its way onto Jaskiers face and he smiled down into his soup, his belly full of butterflies.

“Do you like it?” Eskel had his chin leaning in one of his big hands and smiled openly at his guest.

“Very much so…..”

“Good….I am glad. Now….any names in the diary?”

Laughing Jaskier shook his head.

“None so far. She writes in the first person and she only calls her boyfriend “beloved” it is very cute.”

“Mhm…nicknames are important to show affection. Would you not agree….Buttercup?”

Eskel playfully smiled at him and Jaskier almost dropped his spoon in the soup as he nodded hard and babbled on about the diary.

He wished that every lunch could be like that from now on. Just them in their bubble, the outside world and its problems far away. Dante and Lil´ Bleater curled up around their feet under the table and soft smiles and loving glances. If only it could last forever.


	11. I want to stew in your love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things get more serious

Jaskier spent the rest of the day reading through the diary until Eskel coughed behind him.

“Oh…is it dinner time already?”

Laughing the farmer shook his head, his hat drawn deep into his face, while he chewed on a piece of straw.

“Nah, I just thought you might wanna try some ridin now, Darlin.”

Jaskier stared at the farmer open-mouthed, skin flushing bright red as he swallowed hard.

“Yes…horse…riding…on a horse….yes.”

Chuckling deeply Eskel extended a hand to Jaskier to pull him up. “Well come on Darlin. I already saddled my best stallion for you.”

“Jesus Christ.”

Jaskier swore under his breath and using all of his will power to not make a lewd comment in return, no matter how much he wanted to. He was doing better than a few days ago but he did not want to jeopardize any of his newfound happiness and he really cared for Eskel and did not want to have a quick tumble in the hay but for once in his life something real and meaningful. That said he did still enjoy the flirting and attention the other man was giving him.

Eskel winked at him while bringing him to the stallion, a big black horse named Scorpion, that turned out to have a very calm demeanour. Smiling the cowboy helped Jaskier into the saddle and from then on he was only ever professional while he gave Jaskier instructions. After an hour of riding in a circle, he stopped the training.

“You did good Buttercup for your first lesson. Did you have fun?”

Jaskier beamed at him. Blue eyes sparkling in the setting sun, lips drawn into a huge smile as he eagerly nodded. “It was really great! Can I…can I do it again? Tomorrow?”

Laughing Eskel nodded and helped Jaskier back down, holding him at his hips and slowly dragging him along his own body until he was standing on his own feet again. Stumbling forward Jaskier flung his arms around Eskels neck to steady himself, slightly blushing and chewing on his bottom lip.

“Uhm…sorry…My legs are a bit shaky.”

“That’s normal Darlin. You gonna be sore morrow. You better take a nice hot soak after dinner and let me rub some chamomile oil on your thighs.

Blinking Jaskier looked up into Eskels dark eyes. “You want to rub…..” He swallowed hard. “On my thighs?”

“Mhm…unless you want to do it yourself?”

“No. no! You should definitely take care of me! I am your guest! Hospitality and such.”

“And such.” Laughing Eskel rubbed his nose against Jaskiers jawline who drew in a hissing breath.

“No come on, let's get some food into you.”

Smiling Eskel took Jaskiers hand in his and lead the horse back into his stable, rubbing him off quickly while Jaskier watched, never taking his eyes off Eskel, before they went back to the house to cook together.

It was perfectly domestic and Jaskier never wanted to leave again. Dante and Lil´ Bleater were sleeping in front of the fireplace that Eskel had set ablaze earlier, the autumn air already fresh and the nights cold enough to justify a fire. Jaskier had washed his hands and had pushed his long Flannel shirt arms up to his elbows and was now following instructions for a hearty rabbit stew.

“You don’t mint the rabbit Buttercup?”

Shrugging the singer kept chopping carrots and celery. “I don’t think so? I mean I never had it but I’m not a picky eater.”

“I am glad to hear that…There might be some hot chocolate in your future.”

“Ohhh I like that.”

Smiling Eskel pushed besides Jaskier to get to the fridge, sighing as their butts rubbed together for a second.

“You feel sore yet?”

“No? Should I? I mean I can feel my legs, but nothing too bad.”

“Good.” Without thinking Eskel turned Jaskier around at his hips and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“Oh…I…” Jaskier let the carrot in his hand drop to the counter before grabbing Eskel at the neck and pulling him in for a proper kiss. The farmer chuckles against his lips but soon he was breathing hard as Jaskier plundered his mouth with his own tongue and pulled his bottom lips playfully between his teeth.

“Fuck….”

“Mhm…”

Jaskier rubbed his nose under the spot of Eskels left ear. “Should we talk about this?”

“Mhm probably. During Dinner?”

“Okay….yeah….if it goes well will you still rub my thighs with oil?”

“Oh, Darlin.” Eskel dove back in for another very deep and filthy kiss. “If it goes well, I rub oil all over you.”

Gulping Jaskier pressed his eyes shut and prayed to whatever god was listening that they were on the same page.

They were both silent for the rest of the preparations and when they sat down to eat, they were both looking shyly at each other. Finally, Jaskier could not take it anymore and broke the silence.

“I’ve never been in a real relationship.”

“Oh?” Eskel tried to keep his voice judgements free and waited for the singer to continue.

“Yeah. Not really. I mean I have been in relationships but….I recently figured out that those people were only after my money or fame and did not really care for me as a person.”

Smiling down into his stew Jaskier took a deep breath.

“Look I get if this is too forward but like….I like you…a lot and I think you like me too? Like, the real me? And….I….”

Jaskiers hand was shaking a bit, stew dropping from the spoon back into the bowl and Eskel reached over the table and softly took the singers shaking hand between his, his calloused thumbs softly rubbing over his palm.

“Yeah?”

“And I think this could be something between us. Something real and lasting…. that is…if you are also interested in…perusing such things?”

Smiling Eskel brought Jaskiers hands to his mouth and pressed soft kisses to each fingertip.

“I would like that very much Buttercup.”

“Really?” Jaskier raised his head, beaming brightly and full of hope.

“Really. Now eat your stew pretty boy so I can put you in front of the fire and fill you with hot chocolate.”

Grinning Jaskier took his hand back.

“And here I thought you would like to fill me with other things.”

Eskels gaze darkened as he slowly licked over his bottom lip, making Jaskier shiver.

“Oh Darlin, you have no idea.”


End file.
